Join us for the 10th Annual Take Back the Night March, Rally and Candlelight Vigil to End Sexual Violence. The event is Thursday, May 6th from 6-9 pm in Manchester, NH. 6 pm March starts at the YWCA New Hampshire at 72 Concord Street. We will march down Elm Street and gather at Veteran’s Park in downtown. There speakers, musicians, poets and survivors will speak out at open mic sessions. The Healing Fire will be there for survivors to gather around. The NH Clothesline Project will be displayed that night as well. Check out the YWCA New Hampshire website at www.ywcanh.org or our Facebook page. For more information about the events for Sexual Assault Awareness Month in April 2010, contact dianel@ywcanh.org.

The YWCA New Hampshire offers free confidential support groups for women and men 18+. The women’s group meets Monday nights from 6-7:30 at the 72 Concord Street location. There is FREE childcare available for this group. For more information, call Diane at 625-5785 x 110, dianel@ywcanh.org. The men’s group meets Wednesday evenings from 6-7 at CREATE! Center for Expressive Arts Therapy and Education @ 141 Union Street Manchester, NH. For more information, cal Steven at 625-0010, hellosteven@juno.com.

Thw YWCA NH also offers two support groups for women who have survived domestic violence. The DV for speakers of English is Mondays from 6-7:15 pm at the 72 Concord Street Location. There is FREE childcare for this group. For more information, call Pat at 625-5785 x 112. The DV group for Spanish speaking clients willbegin on March 25th from 6-7:15 pm. There is FREE childcare for this group. For more information, call Shirley at 625-5785 x 121, shirleyv@ywcanh.org, Latina Advocate.

Finally, the YWCA NH willbe offering a general Relationship Violence Support Group at the Derry office starting in late March. For more information, please call Erin at 625-5785. or emal at erinh@ywcanh.org.

Congrats to Dave, Jack and Eric for helping so many victims of domestic and sexual violence!

http://www.unionleader.com/article.aspx?headline=NH+Bar+honors+three+longtime+lawyers&articleId=998ffa70-bfb0-42e5-a875-a24347a10cff

Lessons In Violence Evasion Seminar: The next LIVE Seminar will be happening January 21st from 6 to 9 pm at the YWCA in Manchester to help raise awareness and money for the Crisis Services there. The seminar is free but donations to the YWCA are appreciated. To register please contact:

Diane Larochelle

Education and Outreach Coordinator
YWCA Manchester
72 Concord Street
Manchester, NH 03101
603-625-5785 x 110
dianel@ywcanh.org

Find out more about Lessons In Violence Evasion by clicking here.

January is National Stalking Awareness Month.

Stalking is real.
It can happen to anyone.
It’s dangerous.
And it’s a crime.

Find out more at www.ncvc.org/src

11 Yr Old Shades

Most of the time I see in black and white

“All or nothing” and some shades of red.

Seems more concrete, wrong and right

Easier to see, alive or dead.

These eyes that see the world in these extremes

Always turn inward and try to dream

Of how I would be if I were like you

Who could see in color, like greens and blues.

I feel like I’ll never get there, every year that goes by

I still feel my smile is sometimes a lie

I still wait for the poison after the bite

I wait for the pain, my breathing so tight.

Somedays I give up the hope that I’ll ever be

Someone those people would ever want to see.

Afraid that I’m destined to be an alien to all

Afraid that I’ve spent too much time building this wall.

That even when I myself try to escape

Crazy, odd, naked and they all start to gape.

Tainted, painted with grays and browns

Taught to laugh in uneasy frowns

This ugly duckling just wants to be free

Someday I’ll actually be happy to be me.

Often I feel as if I’m stuck being ten in my mind and I really hate it and sometimes I feel like I wish I could Actually BE ten again.. or eleven

Well, it isn’t Monday but I wrote this after a group session which is held on Mondays

Mondays
Today I learned to breathe.
Today I learned how to feel free.
Like a sip of water in my cupped hand
It all slips away like grains of sand.

Today I remembered how to cry.
Today I remembered how to feel alive.
But like nostalgic scents hovering in the air,
I let it go for a second, and now it’s not there.

Today I discovered how to smile.
Today I threw away the self-denial.
An open door into a better life
Further away from the edge of this knife.

Today I learned how to feel.
Today I learned that it’s ok to be real.
Today I took my hands off my eyes
I let myself see, and I was surprised.

Camouflage

Everyday I think I get closer
I get closer to blending, bending like them.
Out of no where comes this reminder
This is harder than I ever dreamt.

These demons just pop up no matter where I am
Whatever the progression towards a comfortable feel
They hit me so hard and unexpectedly
So invisible, this pain, but so incredibly real.

I pretend to be unaffected
But the attempt is more obvious than the admission.
Now will they all know and shun me?
Will they feed me further in my depression?

* I wrote this after having somewhat of a panic attack after English class. The discussion in this class was centered on a play that had been written from the point of view of a survivor of childhood abuse- her uncle had been a pedophile. Hearing everyone else’s opinions on the narrator not only made my own past come screaming out at me, but it made me feel extremely exposed. I almost lost it in class, but I just waited till I got outside.

Tonight at the sexual asault survivors support group that I facilitate, the topic of covert sexual abuse came up. The women shared stories of those subtle, or not so subtle, forms of sexual abuse that leave the victim feeling like, “Wait a minute…I know that was wrong, but I’m not sure.”

The women talked about everything from exposure to dad’s pornography collection to comments about their developing breasts and included innuendo about their sexuality by male relatives. The women talked about how damaging this type of emotional sexual abuse was just as damaging as actual rapes and molestation. They shared about how crazy it made them feel and how it made them doubt themselves.

I am curious about whether others have had this experience and if there are any resources on this topic I can share with my group.

Here’s a public service announcement created by students of  the University of Maryland. Share it with every man you know.